Puppy Love
Medha Speaks
This share is going to be deeply personal. Yes, Oron (the collective I channel) has given me the most intense and powerful experience of divine love that I’ve ever had. But I’ve been super mad at them.
My dogs died.
And at times, I’ve been blaming Oron. Here’s the short version of the story.
In 2003, I was really sick. I had to quit work and could barely move my arms which meant the basics of life became impossible. Showering, driving, even holding a book and turning the pages was beyond me. And I got super depressed. Proper not-sure-if-I-wanna-stay-alive, kinda depressed.
I went for a channeling and was told to get a dog. I was reluctant ‘coz I didn’t consider myself a ‘dog person’. But I did it and it changed my life. Swami came into my world and he saved me. He reconnected me to my heart and resurrected me and my life.
Five years later, when I was doing better physically and leaving the house more, I didn’t want Swams to be lonely so I got a second dog. Bodhi had an extraordinary desire for fun and adventure and just loved life and he helped to further support the inner changes that Swams had already helped me achieve.
They were my angel boys and they got me through some really shitty times. No matter what was going on, I could always just look at them and my heart melted. They followed me around all the time, gave me a million cuddles, reminded me to play and gave me the most profound and consistent experience of unconditional love I’d ever had. I loved those dogs more than I’ve loved most — probably all — people.
And then one Monday out of the blue, neither of them wanted breakfast. I didn’t know it at the time, but Swami — who was 16 — had a gastro that his gorgeous little body was not going to be able to recover from. And Bodhi’s heart condition, which was being managed with medication — I was told I would likely have him for another year — deteriorated.
Swami died on the Wednesday. Bodhi died the following Monday. Six days apart. Out of nowhere. And I was a fucking mess.
I wailed. I bawled. I screamed.
I cursed at God because losing them both at the same time felt so incredibly ridiculously unfair.
I sat in that for a while and then I realised this. Swami and Bodhi dying so close together wasn’t random. It was what was necessary to help me transcend two things:
- My dependence on the physical and the misunderstanding that I still have that the physical is more real than the energetic.
- My other misunderstanding that the experience of unconditional love that I had with my dogs was limited to my experience WITH the dogs. The reality is that the experience lives inside of ME. And I can have that same amount of unconditional love towards myself and the world and everyone in it, including you. It’s not limited to my puppies.
And I also realised this: the more that I learn to connect to the energy of Swams and Bodhes (rather than relying on their physicality), the easier it’s going to be to connect to the energy of Oron.
Can you see why I was mad at Oron?
My thought was this: “If what it takes for me to be a clear channel is me losing my precious angel boys, then Oron can go find someone else ‘coz that price is just too high. And if they want me to be their channel — which until that point I had really wanted to be — then they should bloody well support me with love and flowers and unicorns and the exact fucking opposite of soul-crushing grief!”
But I get it now, mostly. Coz here’s the thing:
The puppies were living beings with their own consciousness. They always felt divine to me, so I couldn’t doubt their connection. And the reality is that they made their choice. Both of them. I tried to fight it, but I couldn’t, ‘coz I don’t get to create in the experience of the puppies. Just like I don’t get to create in the experience of my loved ones, or in yours. Each of us makes our choices, in both the physical and in the energetic realms.
The reality is that my angel boys were never going to be with me in the physical plane forever. No matter how much I wanted them to or how much money I spent at the vet trying to save each of them.
And I have to say, I’ve felt my connection to the puppies inside of me a few times since they passed and it feels amazing. Like they live in my heart now, so I can take them everywhere I go. Which means they are my ever-present companions now even more than they were before.
And as I started to connect to the energy of the puppies inside of me, I could feel that intense, divine, unconditional love living inside of me too — without the prompting of the physical presence of my puppies. And that’s when I realised that they were a part of the Oron energy all along because it’s the same feeling.
My boys were emissaries, sent to lift my energy and connect me to the vibration of unconditional love that is required to help me channel the Oron energy more powerfully. They were in on it the whole time and that is why they always felt like a part of me. Because they, like Oron, are.
So Oron didn’t cost me my dogs. They sent them to me. And although I can be grateful to Oron now instead of angry, I’m still grieving. And I will be for as long as it takes.
But I do know that in the not too distant future, Oron is coming out of the proverbial closet. They will be transmitting energetic healing, activations and support for anyone that’s ready to receive it. Andhow much you access that and use it, is completely up to you.
Although I do hope you choose it.
With unconditional love,
Medha x
